Kingly Duties

Carl the Mannequin Date Night At Zia’s

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An inside look at the super sweet date night with Carl the Mannequin at Zia’s On The Hill of St Louis.

We were all super hungry so everything on Zia’s menu looked heavenly. Speaking of menu, the ladies at the front brought us three menus. I was happy about that because Carl would not share.

I did my best to get a lady for a double date but no one would go with me. Carl ‘the smooth one’ was able to swoon Lauren to join him [Update: Carl the Mannequin and Lauren are still dating]. Which was great for him but rather annoying. They would not look at the menu to order because they giggled and talked nonstop. I wasn’t sure if we’d ever be able to order.

Finally the waiter was able to take our order.

Carl The Mannequin is very picky when ordering. It took about 10 minutes for him to explain what he wanted. The waiter was patient and seemed not bothered by the emotionalist foodie.

I had a simple order of pasta, salad, and some vino. Lauren too was very picky, asked for raw fish with extra blood on her uncooked steak and a large jug of wine. It was gross (Somethings might be exaggerated in this story).

I’m glad we ate at Zia’s because it did not take long for the elegant meal to arrive. I kicked into gear and ate like the Cookie Monster.

We were told by Carl’s date to wear our bibs. The request turned out to be wise, Carl the Mannequin is a messy eater.

As everyone finished up their meals the conversation turned exclusive once again. I felt a little left out of the heart to heart between the two lovebirds, Carl the Mannequin and Lauren. I decided to chat with anyone who would listen. This kind gent talked for a second but turned around after I asked if I could have the leftovers on his table.

The whole night was quite a fun experience. Especially, after the bill came and I pulled out the stack of money I made as a professional dancer. In fact, Lauren was so impressed with the greens in my jeans, she stood next to me in the customary after-dinner-photo… that every reasonable soul takes… with their waiter… on a date with a mannequin.

Thank you all for taking interest in the Rizzuto Show’s, Real or Fake punishment with Carl The Mannequin. I had a great week and even better meal.

Once again, Zia’s On The Hill, and our waiter, treated us like royalty. Thank you for hosting us and making some of the finest foods on earth.

And most importantly, thank you Lauren for being so sweet to join up on such a crazy task, taking pictures, and for being a most lovely date. You helped keep the eyes off Carl and me.

Hopefully this is last punishment that I’ll ever have to serve.

My Subjects, be kind to each other,

King Scott

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